Pundamonium

Pundamonium by Iris Carden

I love to play with words, which is probably one of the reasons I write. Today, I’m giving you a compilation of (admittedly bad) jokes based on puns.

• I told a guy, known for mansplaining, about a hole in the ground with water in it. He said it was a well, actually.
• How do you make a sausage roll or an apple turnover? Show them the salad dressing, and they’ll politely turn the other way.
• A family of six ants, got together with a family of four ants to rent a house. They’re tenants.
• A kleptomaniac entered the olympics. He took gold; and silver; and bronze.
• I was playing cricket, and couldn’t work out why the ball was getting bigger and bigger. Then it hit me.
• In today’s news, police found the mime who was kidnapped last week. He’d been subjected to unspeakable horrors.
• I bought an amp for my guitar. It was a sound purchase.
• Don’t make left turns. If it’s not right it’s wrong.
• Someone asked why I was standing on one leg at the ATM. I was just checking my balance.
• The short guy climbing down the wall from the prison window was a little condescending.
• A short psychic escaped police custody. Police are looking for a small medium at large.

I’ll leave it there because that’s a whole lot of nonsense and I don’t want to bore you further.

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