by Fantasia Dog

It was a normal day until my friend’s face fell off.

Wait, the human says I can’t start like that. She says readers need context.

I’ll start again.

One of my best friends is Bear. If you ever visit my house you will probably meet Bear, because I introduce her to everyone I like. So far I haven’t met a human I didn’t like. I’ve met some dogs I don’t like, because they bark mean things at me when my human and I go for walks, but that’s another story.

Here is a photo of me with Bear. Bear’s the little one.

Image of Fanta, a brindle Staffordshire bull terrier, with her teddy bear. Caption: Fanta and Bear.

Bear and I play together a lot. Sometimes the games get a little “ruff”. (That’s doggy humour. I know the word is really “rough”, but “ruff” is like barking. Oh the human says I don’t need to explain that.)

Image of Fanta, a brindle Staffordshire bull terrier is chewing the face of her teddy bear. Caption: The games can get a little "ruff".

Sometimes, the game gets so rough one of us (Bear) gets a bit hurt. She’s had lots of stitches, but she never minds because it’s all in good fun.

The other day, after Bear and I had been playing, I went off to do something else. The human called me back, and said, “Fanta, what the hell?”

I looked where she was pointing, and then gave her a look that said, “What the hell, indeed?”

Image of brown teddy bear with a large part of its face missing, and a large hole. Caption: Bear's face was gone.

Most of my friend’s face was gone. Instead her nose and mouth and face, there was just a large hole.

I was totally unprepared for this situation. I know the human writes horror stories and knows about this stuff, but missing faces was something totally new to me.

The human shook her head and said, “This is going to take more than a couple of stitches. There may be no coming back from this.”

I glared at her.

She went and got her sewing things.

Image of brown teddy bear part way through repairs.

She put back all of the stuffing she could find, and then put fabric scraps on top of that. She started sewing.

Image of Fanta, a brindle Staffordshire bull terrier, looking concerned while her brown teddy bear undergoes repairs.  The bear has half a face embroidered back in place. Caption: Fanta was doubtful.

She got out her embroidery threads, and started to put a new face on Bear. I was doubtful it would work. Bear’s face did not look like that.

I tried to explain to the human that that was not how bear looked, but the human said she was doing her best.

I don’t believe her best was good enough.

Image of Fanta, a brindle Staffordshire bull terrier, with her repaired brown teddy bear. Caption reads: Fanta is unhappy with her FrankenBear.

When the human was finished, she gave me this thing. It wasn’t my Bear. Well it was part my Bear, but it had someone else’s face.

Now what do I do? Instead of my very best friend, I only have part of my very best friend. I have a FrankenBear!

I am a most disappointed dog.

Fantasia Dog

Image of Fanta, a brindle Staffordshire bull terrier, on a burgundy-coloured couch.

Fanta is a graduate of the Animal Welfare League Qld shelter, where she was known as Fantasia. On arrival at her forever home, her full name was declared too pretentious, and she became known as Fanta. Occasionally, when she emits noxious gases, she is known as Fartica or Fartica the Hellhound. She likes walks, playing, eating, more eating, and cats when they don’t bite her ears. She dislikes baths, cats when they do bite her ears, and dogs who bark at her when she’s out walking. Although she owns approximately a zillion toys, she only likes to play with Bear, Crocodile and Elephant.


By Iris Carden

Iris Carden is an Australian indie author, mother, grandmother, and chronic illness patient. On good days, she writes. Because of the unpredictability of her health, she writes on an indie basis, not trying to meet deadlines. She lives on a disability support pension now, but her ultimate dream is to earn her own living from her writing.


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